Most people who are trying to fill the pre-defined role of a “mother” feel overwhelmed at the beginning because being a mom seems to have a lot to do with time management. Often moms feel like they are responsible to seemingly effortlessly run all processes of family life. They are scheduling anything from playdates for their kids to entertaining activities on the weekend. They organize their own schedules while also reminding the rest of the household of daily tasks and chores. They are the original personal assistants and that is a stressful job. Starting to be a mom can be a well-prepared choice or a happy surprise. However it usually means a huge change. There is a lack of time and often a lack of experience as well as extremely high expectations of how things need to be done or should look like.
While some people have experience in developing a time management system that rivals that of secretaries and other time management professionals, others struggle with the immense workload. Not everyone needs to be a scheduling hero but with a couple of individual tricks, you can shift from exhaustion into feeling back in control. This includes trying out new techniques and being open to adjust your routines a little ( ⇾ check out our Time Management Events in May). If that feels too hard right now or too time consuming, that is okay. You might feel overwhelmed by constant change and adjustment in your life. Just remember to take one step at the time.
Mothers and other caregivers are the glue that holds families and societies together and keeps the world turning. However, like glue they tend to harden towards themselves and stop taking regular time-outs to relax and restore their energy. Mothers tend to focus on the well-being of all others in their family first and often forget to check-in with themselves. This seems to be very normal. You are normal. To feel better taken care of you need to start including yourself in the circle of people you look after.
While it is easy for the other family members to rely on their mothers continuous efforts, the mother day should shift the focus back to where it belongs: the mother’s well-being.
Every family member benefits from the right to make mistakes, setting boundaries and being able to choose. Find your inner voice and listen to what you need by spending regular time with yourself. This private moment will be beneficial for your mental health and will show your children what it means to set boundaries for oneself and maintain your mental well-being.
If you are a mother, try to focus on the happy moments. Take time for yourself and reflect on becoming a good caregiver for yourself. Be open to your family when they try to be grateful today and listen carefully to what they want to express. Most likely, your family loves and values you, just the way you are.
If you are a child, thank your mother or the person who helped you grow for keeping it all together and making space for you to become who you are. Thank them for being your personal cheerleader of all your accomplishments, for being there when you felt hurt, for having an open ear or a helping hand and for letting you pursue your dreams.
Even if you miss all of this, you still can become this place of warmth and compassion for yourself. For support please contact us. Please feel especially welcome to our Deep Relaxation Session.